Movies for Relationship

The MOVIE-MEDITATION Relationship Tonic!

What movies have been wake-up calls

in YOUR relational journey?

Ever left a movie theatre, contemplating an absorbing film, only to have an “Ah-ha!” moment just a bit later, regarding your OWN relational life….an almost supernatural moment of connecting with what you really feel, seeing things with new clarity, sensing a readiness arising to do what needs to be done?  I have.     (Possibly from an “Ah-ha” that had nothing to do with the filmmaker’s message?)  I have.


Movies can help us be more mindful in our daily relational life, to really be there for what is going on in our connections.

The MOVIE-MEDITATION Relationship Tonic!  It’s like any mindfulness practice that open us up to all the possibilities in our relational reality.   A hot bath, a good conversation with a friend, a walk in the park, playing with a child,….it’s all inviting us into deeper contact with what we are really experiencing, how we really feel, and what the possibilities really are…

How do you do your movie time?

I love this idea from Psychology Today’s  Introvert Power author and expert on the benefits of exploring our inner introvert, Laurie Helgoe,PhD

Movies can give us strength in the face of pain as well. The cinema can serve as what psychoanalysts call a “holding environment” — a safe place to experience emotions that are too big to handle alone. This is what a therapist does for a client.

Helgoe basically recommends making a kind of “sitting practice” or meditation ritual out of movie going.  Consciously choosing to turn our attention to a great film, and let go into the full immersion experience of its story, can be a tool for unlocking stuck points in our relational lives, sometimes in the most unexpected ways.

I have noticed in my work with couples, that if partners can remember to plunge themselves into their individual sensory, emotional, or creative experience regularly, that celebration of their difference breathes new life into their time together!  It’s the necessary living-my-life, that supports living-in-relationship; separation, difference, uniqueness…they all (ironically) make the togetherness dance more vibrant and enjoyable in couple life.

Movies can be one of those dropping-into-the-true-I experiences.    And the true I is the only part of us that can do intimacy.

Try it out…Create your movie ritual and let us know what you discover!    Also, what movies have been wake-up calls in YOUR relational journey?   

Until next time, Builders!

You are changing the world, one present moment at a time!  Booyah!


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