Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type One (the Reformer)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Enneagram Ones and Sixes are alike in many ways and they are often misidentified with each other. Both types are extremely hard workers, conscientious, serious minded, and have a strong sense of duty and honor. They both care deeply about truth and commitment, and both have a desire to serve others and improve the world. Both have a guiding sense of purpose, often lead by deeply held beliefs and ideals. Of course, they also bring other qualities that are especially their own.

Ones bring a sense of reason and mental clarity, the ability to think clearly under pressure and to come to firm decisions quickly. They are more sure of themselves and their opinions than Sixes tend to be, so Ones often serve as the leader in a One-Six relationship, making the final decision and taking responsibility for it. Ones also bring a concern for order and consistency, for logic and elegance that is sometime lacking in Sixes. They may also bring a distinct idealism that has little to do with personal loyalty or hero worship (as it may in a Six). On the other hand, Sixes bring warmth, more emotional responsiveness and availability, generosity, and playfulness that can be endearing and which can make Ones think twice about their certitudes and positions. Sixes also have the ability to connect with people in a more direct and human way than Ones tend to do.

These qualities are attractive to the other and they can make this couple a dynamic and yet highly stable team, provided their fundamental beliefs are in alignment. They take responsibility in relationships, sharing burdens and chores equally. They also feel that they can count on the other: they are steadfast, loyal, and faithful to each other, wanting to build a solid foundation together. Because both can count on the other, this gives both room to relax—something they both need to do more often.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Competency Type (One)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Compliant Type (One)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Body Type (One)

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Twos and Sixes are highly dutiful and take their responsibilities toward each other very seriously. The emphasis tends to be slightly different, however, with Twos focused primarily on building intimacy and positive feelings between themselves and other
individuals, whereas the emphasis of Sixes tends to be on building a foundation of security, a sturdy platform of hard work and trust that everyone can count on.

Both types are highly responsible and tend to put the needs of others before their own. They are both family oriented and foster domesticity; they easily share duties around the house and with their children or friends. They are both socially involved in their community and see great value in having many social connections which give them the feeling that they are valued in their world. Sixes value the warmth, kindheartedness, generosity, and self-sacrifice of the Two. Sixes are aware of how well suited Twos are to be an excellent, devoted spouse and parent, and that they could be trusted to be loyal.  On the other hand, Twos will likely admire the hard work, steadfastness to commitments, perseverance, modesty and playfulness of Sixes. Even if they should sometimes be grumpy and indecisive, Twos realize that healthy Sixes almost always come around in the end.  Caution and vigilance are recognized as worthwhile assets in what can be a cruel and exploitative world. Twos often feel that they can count on the Six’s watchfulness to spot difficulties before they become problems.

When Twos and Sixes are healthy, they may actually admire each other more than they feel a grand passion for each other. Their relationship may be based more on steadiness, mutual respect, and affection than on some kind of overheated chemistry between them.  They see the other as good and dependable, and that is often more than enough as a basis for an enduring and productive life together.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Positive Outlook Type (Two)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Compliant Type (Two)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Heat Type (Two)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Three (the Achiever)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Surprisingly, this is not a common pairing, although these two types can work very well as a team.

On the positive side, Threes bring hard work, optimism, energy, a desire to communicate to and connect with people, and a feeling of unlimited potential both personally and in the relationship itself. Threes can bring an enormous sense of self confidence and the hope of success that is assured—that this relationship is a winning team or that this couple is the best ever! Common goals bring them together—they are both practical and want to achieve tangible things in the world. Sixes bring grounding, industrious hard work, perseverance in difficult times and personal loyalty to the Three. Sixes provide warmth, support, and a great deal of practical good sense. Sixes can also bring a compassion for the downtrodden or the less fortunate in life. Threes can pick up on this compassionate quality in Sixes and learn to open their own hearts more deeply to the underprivileged and the unfortunate.

Both believe in applying elbow grease toward goals, whether toward financial security or developing personal talents. In short, they are both doers. They foster equality and mutual respect for the different talents each brings and the shared interests they invest in. Threes help bolster the Six’s confidence and develop their self-esteem. Sixes offer support to Threes without Threes feeling smothered. Sixes also help Threes to become part of something bigger than themselves-a church, a service organization, a political or spiritual group. Both become stronger individually and as a team by “finding themselves” through service and humble hard work. Respect for each other can grow as each continues to discover the other’s good qualities.

This can be a very enduring and successful couple as long as heart-centered values and deeper principles keeps them both grounded.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Competency Type (Three)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with an Assertive Type (Three)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Heart Type (Three)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Four (the Individualist)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Fours and Sixes, have many natural affinities for each other, especially since both are highly emotional and often feel insecure around people. Both tend to strong, immediate feelings and to act on their unconscious hunches or intuitions. Sixes often misidentify themselves initially as Fours because of the traits that they actually have in common. These very traits can also be ones that they bring to the relationship, enabling them to have an unusual degree of empathy and tolerance for each other. In short, Fours and Sixes can bring to each other the feeling that they are kindred souls, connected by their feelings of abandonment and a certain distrust of others. They may feel like “orphans in the storm” who offer mutual support and reassurance.

Rather than energize each other, when they are healthy, Fours and Sixes tend to support and stabilize each other, usually acting as a sounding board for worries and complaints that they feel they cannot air anywhere else.  Fours bring sensitivity, sensuality, and the ability to express emotions openly, including the feelings that Sixes themselves do not know how to express. Fours talk about their inner lives—again, something that Sixes often need to learn. Sixes bring hard work, perseverance, practicality, loyalty, and concern with security to the relationship. They are also often warm and unpredictably playful and able to break through whatever gloom and self-absorption Fours may periodically fall into. Fours give Sixes the sense that they are needed—helping to give Sixes more confidence in their ability to cope with things. Sixes like being practical and they often provide Fours with a platform of some kind to develop their creativity as well as the time and support they may need to work through their emotional issues.

This combination creates steadiness and daring, balance and the ability to fill in the gaps for each other both in their own development and in practical affairs.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Four)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Withdrawn Type (Four)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Heart Type (Four)

 

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Five (the Investigator)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Fives and Sixes are mental types, although there are significant differences. Both have respect for the intellectual acumen of the other and the expertise and technical mastery the other possesses. They may well begin a relationship as colleagues or by
sharing the same professional area of interest which forms the basis for a friendship and eventually something more intimate. Both types respect detail, factual objectivity and accuracy, craftsmanship, and the ability to analyze situations without inserting personal opinions or
biases.

As a pair, Fives and Sixes can be highly effective in dealing with crises because both are attuned to danger and to bringing their expertise to solve problems.  Fives also offer emotional calm, detached objectivity, observational skills, an unusual and penetrating curiosity, and an unwillingness to settle for easy answers. Sixes bring strongly held values and ideas that make them less objective than Fives although they are more passionate. Their very emotional reactivity—including anxiety and feargives Sixes a more sympathetic, human quality. Sixes are more openly unsure of themselves and often look to authorities of some kind (including the Fives they trust) to give them guidance and advice. Fives tend to be surer of their ability to think for themselves and to entertain new ideas. Fives also tend to be more skeptical and rejecting of authority. Fives are accepting of Sixes’ changing needs for independence with connection; they are also patient with the Six’s vacillations. The devotion of Sixes and understated caring can break through the Five’s tendency to isolate.

Thus, Fives and Sixes, as a pair, tend to have a symbiotic intellectual relationship of doubt and decision, questions and answers, problems solved and problems discovered that can be endlessly stimulating. In any event, for a relationship between these two opposite head types to work, there must be a tested and unshakable trust between them: they may often come to different conclusions, but they at least know that their hearts and minds are in the right place.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Competency Type (Five)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Withdrawn Type (Five)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Head Type (Five)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

As with all double-type relationships, two Enneagram Sixes generally bring the same qualities to each other. Therein lies both a main source of the attraction as well as one of the main pitfalls. Thus, the Level of health of each person is especially important for these types of
relationships as are their dominant instincts. Strong Six couples understand each other deeply and make a point of trying to understand what they don’t understand.

Two Sixes usually bond with each other very quickly sensing a kindred spirit, and there can rapidly develop a playful, bantering, buddies-in-arms kind of excited collusion and relief, like two kids who have found each other in the woods and can help each other to safety.  A double Six couple will have a sense of shared secrets and values, of intellectual stimulation and questioning that they find both useful and stimulating.  Trust is extremely important to both Sixes, and once it has been established, it allows them to relax and enjoy themselves as they do with few others. Trust allows double Six couples to think aloud to test ideas, voice doubts and suspicions, and to discover what they really feel about various things.

They give each other a lot of support and mutual protection, and are ready to come to the other’s aid without hesitation. Loyalty, commitment, and a “You’re my friend, no questions asked” attitude reinforces the feelings of security and safety that they build together. There can also be a great deal of unspoken sensitivity and delicacy in a double Six relationship. Sixes are generally not adept at talking about their feelings directly, so their feelings and attitudes are mostly expressed in their actions and in the depth of their dedication and steadfastness. Each person also inspires the other as each works for the other’s welfare and happiness, often more energetically than they would for their own alone.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Six)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Compliant Type (Six)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Head Type (Six)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Seven (the Enthusiast)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Sixes and Sevens are mental types, and there can be a great deal of mental stimulation in this pairing.  These two types offer many areas in which they reinforce each other, and some areas in which the strengths of one counterbalance the limitations of the other.

Sevens are usually entertaining and tend to lift the spirits of Sixes. Both are quick mentally and often have rapier wits: they enjoy bantering with each other, verbally sparring and seeing how absurd or funny they can become as they push each other to more outrageous limits. Sevens are particularly good at generating new ideas while Sixes are particularly good at mastering the practical steps that are necessary to get things done. Sevens help Sixes put fear and limitation into perspective, and sometimes to move beyond them entirely. They thus make effective team members in which the Seven lays out the big picture and gets people excited about new possibilities while the Six moves in with the logistical and tactical know-how, following through with the details. In intimate relationships, the same balance pertains: Sevens are the stimulators, Sixes are the regulators—and they can keep each moving forward by allowing the other to counterbalance their own limitations.

To this visionary-functionary mix, Sixes bring commitment and loyalty to the Seven, often an expertise and groundedness that the Seven comes to trust and rely on implicitly, as well as a strong grip on reality and what can be accomplished within given parameters. Sevens bring a driving sense of optimism and possibility, high energy, a sense of adventure, and fearlessness with regard to failure. They can teach Sixes how to be resilient and how not to fear the future, while Sixes can teach Sevens the difference between optimism and pipe dreams.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Positive Outlook Type (Seven)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with an Assertive Type (Seven)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Body Type (Eight)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Eight (the Challenger)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Enneagram Sixes and Eights can build an extraordinarily strong, longlasting relationship on what is, at root, a defensive view of the world.  Both types feel that most people and the world are selfish and untrustworthy, and that they world is highly unpredictable. One
therefore needs to take care of oneself and one’s own interests (Eights) and have strong allies and the ability to get back up from one’s friends (Sixes). Both Sixes and Eights have deep issues with trust; and with finding people they are able to trust-and so when they have found
each other and have gone through a period of testing, their alliance can be solid and deep.

Once they have bonded with each other, both types have done so on a deep level of their being, and while the relationship may change over time, they are never indifferent to each other. They both admire and try to embody strength, commitment to one’s word, honor, unquestioned loyalty, responsibility, hard work, courage, a spirit of protectiveness, and fighting for the underdog. Both are doers, and enjoy being active, getting tasks accomplished, building a more safe and secure world for themselves and their loved ones.  Sixes bring warmth, the desire for personal connection and commitment, a certain playfulness and sensitivity.  They are also mental types and bring skepticism, analytic thinking, and the ability to think through decisions and to foresee outcomes and potential problems before acting. Sixes thus tend to act as advisors and lieutenants to Eights who tend to take the lead and provide the vision and audacity that Sixes sometimes lack themselves. Eights also bring directness and decisiveness, strong wills, confidence, a can do spirit that is energized by adversity and a penchant for taking on challenges. Sixes tend to look up to the Eights as their hero, while Eights are touched by the Six’s devotion and courage. Eights are aware of their inner struggles and what it takes to overcome them.

When there is genuine affection between these two types, there may be fireworks and occasional fights, but the bond only seems to grow stronger with time.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Eight)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with an Assertive Type (Eight)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Body Type (Eight)

 

 

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

with

Enneagram Type Nine (the Peacemaker)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

This is one of the most stable and most common relationships. Although both types are very different, they want rather similar things: security and predictability (Sixes) and stability and autonomy (Nines). They both want their lives to be built on solid, dependable values and for good, honest work to be rewarded. Both types tend to personify “middle of the road” values in their time and culture, to be dutiful, respectful of authority, and to abide by the rule of law.

On the other hand, there is a rebellious streak in Sixes and a counterculture streak in Nines that allows some of these couples to live on the fringes of society, to be unusual in their lifestyle and beliefs, to be free thinkers and unconcerned about conventional values and mores.  More for Sixes and Nines than for most couples, much depends on their belief systems and the quality of their childhood experiences—and they are looking for a partner who will mirror this, including their own beliefs and reactions. To this mix, there are also complementary differences: Sixes bring a more active mind, questioning and alert to exceptions, to problems, and to safety issues. They can be more skeptical of others and find it more difficult to be trusting: others need to prove themselves first. Nines, on the other hand, are usually trusting and unquestioning, sunny and easy to get along with. They are optimistic and steady, offering support and non-threatening acceptance. If Sixes tend to see the exception and to focus on complications, Nines tend to see the general and to focus on what will work without problems. This couple gets along well, greasing each other’s wheels and adding just enough gas to the mix to keep them moving forward together. Change, when it comes, is slow and methodical.

Both tend to see themselves as simple, regular people and do not feel special or exempt in any way.  Both bolster the other’s confidence through their solidarity with each other. They are generous with each other and do not crowd the other or make special demands. When they find a relationship such as this, it usually feels like they have found what their heart has been seeking and their dream has come true.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  an Emotional Intensity Type (Six) with a Positive Outlook Type (Nine)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Six) with a Withdrawn Type (Nine)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Head Type (Six) with a Body Type (Nine)










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