Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type One (the Reformer)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Enneagram Ones and Twos are a complementary couple since both offer the other the example of their own qualities.

Both types are highly dutiful and are attracted to service roles and occupations: both may be teachers, ministers, or health care workers who have long hours and many responsibilities. One and Two couples are often professionals whose work takes them out of the house and requires the focus of their attention to be on the needs of others, not on the relationship itself or even on themselves personally. People in this kind of
relationship are often unusually mature and independent and able to obtain their emotional needs from a variety of people and connections, including their professional ones. They bring high ideals, strong ethical standards, and the desire to serve others to the relationship itself, keeping the relationship strong and in touch with solid values and practical perspectives.  The relationship is built around shared values: both are on a path of some kind together.

Twos bring the nurturing and feelings that Ones do not easily allow themselves: they help Ones soften and relax. On the other hand, Ones bring integrity, conscientiousness, responsibility, and consistency. They are steady, reliable, and truthful. Ones commit strongly which makes the Two feel secure and that they won’t be abandoned. Further, Twos bring warmth, a concern with people and a willingness to make exceptions to the rule for individuals in need. They are aware of suffering and work hard and generously to alleviate it wherever they can. Twos are more convivial and welcoming than Ones and can warm up the One’s more typically reserved exterior, which most Ones are glad to have happen.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Competency Type (One)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Compliant Type (One)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Body Type (One)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

As with all double-type relationships, two Enneagram Twos bring many of the same qualities to each other. Therein lies both a main source of the attraction as well as one of the main pitfalls of this pair.

Healthy Two couples bring a high level of warmth, affection, and sensitivity to each other. They are genuinely concerned about the welfare of their partner and of the relationship itself, and they are willing and able to put out a considerable amount of energy to make sure that all is well. A double Two pair has a high level of communication and checking in between them: two Twos would have no problem discussing how they feel, inquiring about the other’s health, about how things are going at work, and so forth. They would also be delighted to help support the efforts of their partner in whatever ways they could.

Both individually and as a couple, they are thoughtful, observant of people’s needs, generous and respectful of boundaries and the need of others to be independent and to learn things on their own. Healthy Two couples can express enormous affection for others, while at the same time, letting them go appropriately. They also can find a balance between themselves as a couple and each of them as an individual.  Interestingly, since neither is used to being nurtured by someone else, they generally need to learn to allow themselves to be loved and helped by the other.

If each of the Twos can take in the support of the other, the relationship can become a source of deep love and abundance from which they are able to more fully move out into the world. They feel secure and are loyal to each other, knowing that their partner is there for them. At their best, this is a loving, warm-hearted couple that uses the security of their relationship to raise a family, adopt children, and make the world a richer, more loving place. They reach out to others and build a family of choice, a home that others truly want to be a part of.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Positive Outlook Type (Two)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Compliant Type (Two)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Heart Type (Two)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Three (the Achiever)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Twos and Threes are driven by their feelings and emotional needs-although this is not always apparent in the case of Threes.  Both are also driven by their need for attention and the desire to be loved-although this is not always apparent in the case of Twos.
But for these reasons, both are oriented toward people and toward activities that will place them in the spotlight. This makes the Two/Three couple one of the most interpersonally attractive and impactful pairings possible.

Individually and collectively, they are outgoing, sociable, high-spirited, charming, and often physically attractive. Both know how to make a favorable impression on people and to win them over. Each type brings energy, personal and social ambition, the ability to communicate with people and to make others feel like they are the center of attention. Both know how to get people to like them and to rally support to achieve their goals.

Twos in particular bring a more personal, individual focus to their interactions with others. They are thoughtful and follow up exchanges with genuine kindness and compassion. Threes bring flexibility, charm, practicality, and a goal-oriented vision for ways the couple can improve. Twos like to feel proud of their loved ones, and Threes want to make their partner proud.  There is also a particular way that this pairing works as a team: Twos like to put the spotlight on others, and Threes like to be in the spotlight. Twos like to be the power behind the throne, and Threes can be happy being the point person for the couple. As long as healthy Threes appreciate the lavish attention of the Two, this arrangement can work well.

In a sense, this is almost an ideal political couple: socially adept, energetic, virtually radiating charm and self-confidence, inviting others (by their manner and attractiveness) to join them in some way. Twos and Threes can be dazzling—a couple so widely admired and socially gifted that they become icons for their social sphere and time.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Competency Type (Three)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with an Assertive Type (Three)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Heart Type (Three)

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Four (the Individualist)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

This can be a very warm, even passionate, couple when both parties continue to share their feelings openly together. Both are seeking warmth and connection, and both are willing to provide it when they are healthy. Hence, once they have gotten over the initial hurdles of
intimacy, Enneagram Twos and Fours can be a safe place for each to share their hopes, fears, and insecurities.  They can be good medicine for each other.

Twos contribute sociability and energy, giving Fours the confidence to interact more easily with others. Twos are warm, outgoing, thoughtful and considerate, generous, and encouraging.  Twos are also practical and action-oriented, willing to pitch in where needed and to do the things that need to be done, no matter how unpleasant or un-glamorous.

To this mix, Fours bring creativity, a sense of humor, a willingness to laugh at human foibles, and emotional honesty. They see their own craziness and their own falseness and they do not try to varnish the truth of their quirks from themselves or from the Two.  Fours also bring a sense of beauty and of subtlety into the relationship: they care about how things impact on themselves and others, and so they go out of their way to arrange their world to be more aesthetically pleasing, allowing the Two to feel more relaxed and nurtured. Fours also bring emotional depth and sensitivity to their relationships, a sense of mystery and unpredictability, sensuality and sexual freedom.

In short, Fours invite Twos to take a closer look at their deeper needs, the truth of who they are and what they actually feel. Twos appreciate the subtleties and nuances that Fours bring, and Fours thrive in this atmosphere of appreciation. They can lighten up each other with unexpected humor and appreciation of each others’ quirks. Each invites the other to mature emotionally, usually without saying so. bBoth help the other to stop being so concerned about what others think of them and to become more inner-directed.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Four)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Withdrawn Type (Four)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Heart Type (Four)

 

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Five (the Investigator)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Enneagram Twos and Fives are double opposites, as it were, a people person versus a loner, a feeling type with a thinking type.   Twos and Fives come from different points of view on what is important in life and in a relationship. And yet, because they are so different, there can also be an intense attraction to the mystery of the other.

Twos and Fives are a more common pairing than might be expected.   Twos can see Fives as challenges: distant, mentally preoccupied, not giving many outward signals, and difficult to charm easily because they are so private. It is hard to know what pleases Fives which makes Twos only try harder. Twos bring to the relationship a willingness to take the initiative and to pursue the Five, to be the first one to call or to ask for a date, no matter which gender they are. When healthy, Twos bring warmth, physical comfort and ease (something Fives typically lack), a desire to improve the Five’s living conditions, style of dress and eating habits, and many other marks of thoughtfulness-as signs of affection and genuine interest.   Fives are usually not unaware of these, though they may not outwardly react to the expressions of affection of Twos, Fives are secretly pleased that anyone cares and is being attentive to them.  

For their part, Fives are usually very loyal: they find relationships complex and difficult, so they tend to value one that begins to work, and they tend to put energy into it. Fives bring stability and quiet, dispassionate good judgment and objectivity, particularly in crises.  When Fives focus, they are good listeners and give undivided attention.  They are not as attached to outcomes, and so can often make decisions more wisely and be good advisors to more emotionally volatile Twos. Fives are often more calm than Twos, and this gives them both types a feeling of steadiness and of hope.

In short, Fives stabilize Twos’ emotionality, while Twos warm up Fives’ coolness. Twos enjoy seeing that their attention and affections have had positive, visible effects on the Five. Fives secretly like being doted over and finally finding the nurturing they have unconsciously been seeking (but may have almost given up on).

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Competency Type (Five)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Withdrawn Type (Five)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Head Type (Five)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Six (the Loyalist)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Both Enneagram Twos and Sixes are highly dutiful and take their responsibilities toward each other very seriously. The emphasis tends to be slightly different, however, with Twos focused primarily on building intimacy and positive feelings between themselves and other
individuals, whereas the emphasis of Sixes tends to be on building a foundation of security, a sturdy platform of hard work and trust that everyone can count on.

Both types are highly responsible and tend to put the needs of others before their own. They are both family oriented and foster domesticity; they easily share duties around the house and with their children or friends. They are both socially involved in their community and see great value in having many social connections which give them the feeling that they are valued in their world. Sixes value the warmth, kindheartedness, generosity, and self-sacrifice of the Two. Sixes are aware of how well suited Twos are to be an excellent, devoted spouse and parent, and that they could be trusted to be loyal.  On the other hand, Twos will likely admire the hard work, steadfastness to commitments, perseverance, modesty and playfulness of Sixes. Even if they should sometimes be grumpy and indecisive, Twos realize that healthy Sixes almost always come around in the end.  Caution and vigilance are recognized as worthwhile assets in what can be a cruel and exploitative world. Twos often feel that they can count on the Six’s watchfulness to spot difficulties before they become problems.

When Twos and Sixes are healthy, they may actually admire each other more than they feel a grand passion for each other. Their relationship may be based more on steadiness, mutual respect, and affection than on some kind of overheated chemistry between them.  They see the other as good and dependable, and that is often more than enough as a basis for an enduring and productive life together.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Six)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Compliant Type (Six)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Head Type (Six)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Seven (the Enthusiast)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

In many ways, both of these types can look alike. Both Enneagram Twos and Sevens can be outgoing, friendly, funny, high-energy people and very enjoyable company. They want others to be happy and to have a good time, and both types tend to interpret things (including
setbacks) in a positive way—always looking for the silver lining or the blessing in a seeming disaster. Both types are engaging, spontaneous, and love the good things of life.

In addition, Twos bring a depth of feeling and concern for the welfare of others into the mix. Twos admire the nerve and gusto with which Sevens plunge ahead in life, making everyday an unpredictable adventure. Sevens bring high energy, and a quick mind that sees possibilities and generates ideas faster than they can be acted on. There is a kind of mental electricity and excitement that Sevens generate—the aura of sheer possibility that Twos find intoxicating, not only for themselves but for those they want to share their excitement with. The Seven helps the Two to remember to do nice things for themselves on a regular basis. They remind Twos that if they are not taking care of their own health and fulfillment, they will not really be able to be helpful to others. On the other hand, healthy Sevens feel that their emotional and physical needs are largely met by a healthy Two. The Two helps the Seven feel relaxed and fulfilled, reducing the temptation to wander.

Further, both Twos and Sevens are idealistic, but Twos can more easily and consistently translate this impulse into altruistic action. This inspires the Seven who also enjoys sharing their abundance with others. Together, they can be remarkably generous and thoughtful as a couple. The Two and Seven combination can have a positive effect on people that is virtually unmatched by any other couple: they can be warm, welcoming and generous, making others feel loved and invited to the party.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Positive Outlook Type (Seven)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with an Assertive Type (Seven)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Head Type (Seven)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Eight (the Challenger)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

These two types are more alike than they might appear to be at first.  Both are action-oriented and want to have a personal impact on their environment. Both can be sentimental and deeply feeling, with a soft side that is often more hidden than apparent. Both can play the roles of provider, protector, caretaker, and nurturer while avoiding or even denying their own needs. Both tend to overwork themselves and both tend to be the strong one in relationships (although Twos will tend to do so as the power behind the throne while Eights will tend to clearly be on the throne). Both types bring passion, vitality, interpersonal and social skills, magnanimity, and generosity.

The basic emphasis of both types is distinctly different, however, with Twos being primarily interested in the welfare of others while Eights tend to be interested in their physical wellbeing and in having a distinct impact on their world, often with beneficial fallout for others. They easily play roles that the other needs and wants: the Eight is practical and concerned with results, whereas Twos are more peopleoriented and more openly altruistic. They are both strong willed and like taking on responsibility, as long as they choose it themselves. Eights often bask in the glow of the Two’s affection and adoration: Twos truly appreciate the Eight’s strength and efforts—and see their often hidden self-sacrifice.

Both see each other’s noble qualities and can be each other’s staunchest supporters and admirers. Their roles are also clearly delineated, so they do not get in each other’s way. Each runs different spheres of their lives and cover different bases (one plays the symbolic Mommy the other the symbolic Daddy and things are clear and balanced).  These qualities make this couple powerful allies who complement each other’s strengths, particularly the good effects they can have on others.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with an Emotional Intensity Type (Eight)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with an Assertive Type (Eight)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Body Type (Eight)

 

Enneagram Type Two (the Helper)

with

Enneagram Type Nine (the Peacemaker)

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship:

Enneagram Twos and Nines are similar in a wide variety of areas and reactions; both types are iinterested in nurturing others and in helping people to be better, more comfortable with themselves, and more at peace. Both types also tend to be optimistic and to reframe
disappointments in the most positive way possible. This pairing has an outstanding warm, kindly, and good-nature quality about it that each side reinforces.  Twos and Nines are easy-going, hospitable, and undemanding, happy to make friends happy and to welcome them into their home.

Twos bring to the pair a more outward and interpersonally engaging energy: they would most likely be the first to introduce themselves at a party or to go to someone’s aid and comfort if they perceived that the other person had some kind of problem. Twos are proud of their relationship, their home, their family and their friends, and they want to share them with others. Twos constantly add energy and new people to the relationship mix. They are more talkative than Nines and more openly curious about other people, how they live and what they are like, and more eager to get involved in others’ lives.  On the other hand, Nines bring a quiet steadiness and uncomplicated directness that allows people to flourish and things to get done with a minimum of stress and conflict. Even if Twos become upset about their relationships, or are feeling moments of self-doubt about how loved they are, Nines have a way of calming them down and of providing a great deal of unquestioned acceptance.

Both types are drawn to each other to provide soothing and support; their home and hearth, pets and love of nature are extremely important to them. Both go out of their way to be considerate of each other, as well as of other people.  Much of their best communication is non-verbal, physical, arising from their simple, direct presence to each other. They can develop almost a psychic link with each other. This is a very mellow couple, whose emphasis on hospitality reminds people of how healing it is to be around loving, generous people.

CLICK HERE for more comments from Riso & Hudson regarding potential trouble spots with this combination!

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HARMONICS – CONFLICT STYLES:  a Positive Outlook Type (Two) with a Positive Outlook Type (Nine)

HORNEYVIAN TRIADS  (TENDENCY FOR “AGAINST,” “WITH,” or “AWAY” MOVEMENT IN RELATIONSHIPS): a Compliant Type (Two) with a Withdrawn Type (Nine)

CENTERS OF PERSONALITY STYLES  (INSTINCTUAL, FEELING, or THINKING TYPE): a Heart Type (Two) with a Body Type (Nine)









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